Bill collectors

Dec. 14, 2015

 

Dear Hildie:

 

It is indeed frightening that a stranger with a clipboard has been sneaking up on you looking for your son Riley. Didn’t you tell him Riley was in jail in Mexico? Bill collectors surely won’t bother him there unless they have connections with the cartels. I think your plan is the right one—get his license number and then take that company to court for doing business on Sunday. Take a picture of him, his car, and his plates.

 

The annual Xmas party (to which you’re always invited but never attended when I sent you an invite) was a great success but my knees require me to sit down a lot and entertain as if I were a king on a throne, which, humble person that I am, I don’t like to do. Anyway, there’s plenty left to eat, so feel free to drop around for some.

 

Got several emails from Amos. All gibberish. Sounds like he’s off his meds. I’ve blocked his address.

 

Now I have to prepare a proposal.

 

Take care.

Love,

M

 

 

Grinch

Dec 11, 2015

Dear Hildie:

As expected, I get deluged with proposals to write just before Xmas.

Nothing really to report. I’m ready for Xmas, wearing my Grinch shirt.

Take care,

Love,

M

 

The Old Reaper

Dec. 10, 2015

Dear Hildie:

I’m reading Lacquer’s book on the treatment of the body after death. Very well-written. I’m not sure he got the Aztecs right, though.

I’m finished with all my scanning and revising and now I’m ready to sit down and start something else, if I can get the energy. God, it’s so depressing right now—So many people I know are either dying or have already died. I feel like the old reaper’s knocking.

Things are quiet at the office now as I wait to see what happens this week and the next.

Take care, old thing.

Love,

M

Trump

 

 

Dec. 9, 2015

Dear Hildie:

My God, what did the post office do to my December 2 letter? Do they have dogs in the sorting room, who chew up the mail?

Yes, you lead a more active life than I and shall probably outlive me. What can I say? Except I feel life ebbing fast. I see my doctor on the 21st for a routine exam but there are some things I need to discuss with him, like last rights. Well, you always accuse me of considering the medical profession a priesthood.

I am enjoying Donald Trump and wish him (almost) every success–He’s going to cost the Republicans the election! I can’t believe there are so many dumb people who believe all his clap-trap. But all this is just high entertainment for the masses and the media love it. What with mass shootings and his ignorant bombast, they get to fill out their programs. It’s more fun for them to be able to interrupt him during an interview than to continually ask survivors of massacres, “How did you feel when the gun was pointed at you?”

Ah, me. Life is strange.

Take care,

Love,

M

Birthday

Happy birthday, Hildie!

One more good eatery gone

Dec. 7, 2015

Dear Hildie:

We had a nice little jaunt to Livonia Friday, to a defunct plantation. But I was going to take the crew to eat at Joe’s Dreyfuss store and it was closed. For years that’s been a well-known local eatery and the one time I ate there, about five years ago, it was good. Instead, we ate at Camille’s Cajun Cafe in Erwinville. The hushpuppies had a fishy taste, probably from the oil they were fried in, but the red beans and rice were excellent.

Right now, I have no desire greater than for there to be cold weather so I can ensconce myself by the fire with eggnog or hot chocolate and a good book and not stir out again until March! But I fear that if victuals are to be put on the table that can’t happen.

Take care.

Love,

M

Over the river and through the woods

Dear Hildie: Over the (Mississippi) River and through the woods to a ruined plantation! Happy weekend!

Love,
M and crew

 

 

 

 

 

 

Long and short lists

Dec. 3, 2015

 

Dear Hildie:

 

You aren’t the only one who gets mail late. For the last few months they’ve been coming around 5 to 7 p.m. Last night the mail person was wearing a headlamp! Another thing, brought on my being PC and saying “mail person.” Why do the news people insult all us long-maligned males by saying “gunman” and “manhunt,” as with the case of the San Berdoo shootings yesterday? I demand they be more respectful of my gender! Of course, they can’t help it, being linguistically challenged. “A shootout with a black SUV.” Really? Was the SUV spitting bullets? That reminds me of another practice the illiterate press seems to employ: “Both of the two men were not involved.” My God! Could anything be more awkwardly phrased? Where did these people go to school? By the way, I note an amusing tendency among publishers these days. They used to put on book jackets: “Winner—1995 Pulitzer Prize”.  Then it became: “Nominated for the 2010 Pulitzer Prize.” Then “Short-listed for the 2012 Pulitzer Prize.” Now it’s “Long-listed for the 2014 Pulitzer Prize.” Now I have to wonder how long a long list is: 1,000 books? The poor bastards are desperate!

 

You upbraided me Thursday last for not visiting, but for the past year or so you’ve been busy every day! How am I supposed to deal with that?

 

Oh, and another thing: What would you like for Christmas? I was going to get you an electric blanket (again) but you went out and bought one.  Please give me some ideas quickly!

 

And thanks for the Christmas card. It was the first one to come this year and will certainly be the most insulting. But it’s on the mark: Doubtless Pierre will pee on our Christmas tree when we get it!

 

Take care, old thing.

Love,

M

 

 

 

Irish carolers and the coroner’s van

Dec 2, 2015

Dear Hildie:

I’m listening now to the Libera Irish carolers. I wish the hell I were in Armagh right now. Ireland is such a wonderful place, when Irishmen aren’t killing one another, which they seem to do with great gusto when it happens.  Of course, it’s fine to be right here, but I only want at this point to curl up in my chair with a novel and some history books and enjoy the fire, though it isn’t quite that cold yet, and may never be again with global warming (though that may have a cold-winter effect here, I understand). If t were up to me, the whole world would have only one season–Halloween to New Years.

Boy, talk about bad advertising—I was passing Zippy’s Mexican food on Perkins  yesterday at lunch time and among the many cars, there was the coroner’s van. They should, for the sake of their business, ask these folks to park out of sight!

I read some reviews of the Ted Koppel book predicting Armageddon. The NY Times review was pretty tepid, but I can’t really fault the basic premise: Surely it will happen here, sooner or later. And when it does, what then? The terrorists will do it to get us to intervene massively in the tar baby of the Middle East, which would be a terrible mistake, as the president realizes. But American popular opinion, being Neanderthal, will insist, whoever the president is, and then after a few years or decades, will have second thoughts, but by then…?

I have an appointment to visit my sick friend at 10:00 this morning. Did anybody ever have such a scripted plan for dying? Hey, he’s my beloved friend, and I think he’d laugh at that. In fact, last time I told him it was hard to get an audience and he laughed.

Take care, you old thing.

Love,

M

Christmas music and John Grisham

Dec. 1, 2015

 

Dear Hildie:

 

I didn’t get in to see my sick friend yesterday because his schedule was full (!). I’ll try again today.

 

I’m busy sending out party invitations. MM swears this will be the last year. I understand completely. Meanwhile, I’m listening to Xmas music, and at home I’m reading the latest John Grisham. I needed something to relax with.

 

Well, take care. I’m sure with the rain today you won’t be out and about.

Love,

M